Valentine's Day 2008

Valentine's day 2008. This is a day that I have distinctly made a point of disregarding in my life time. I suppose for the longest time, I associated Valentine's Day with certain things that made me resent it, you know stuff like, relationships, love, boys and anything that might make you go AWWWW. I didn't get a card or candy from a boy I liked so to me the day was a waste.

This year I received texts, and valentines from friends, primarily female. I went to a Jazz cafe in D.C. with my friends. But it was all still bitter sweet. I reminisced on Valentine's of old, as the jazz band played in the background, sultry sounds mixed with the up tempo beat of a drum, caressed with the underlying subtlety of the plucked strings of a bass. All the band members including the singer closed their eyes as they played...I closed mine too...I never really had a valentine, but I'd always wanted one. And to be honest I can't really remember any of the previous February 14th's except for one. I suppose I was especially miserable this day. I sat in the dark, and I didn't want to be bothered. I was sad. It was another February 14th and feel like in the relationship realm I had failed. Yes you have your friends that send you cute cards, you plan to do things to get your mind off of THIS day, but we had done all, and I sat, alone.

My phone rang and I picked it up. I had something at the Student Union Building. I wasn't really interested in leaving where I was, but I did. I was curious...I had something...hmm. I scurried over to see what it was. It was a single red carnation, with a ribbon and a message attached. If was from a person that at that time I was quite found of. He had taken the time to send ME a carnation with a message

"All Men Aren't Dogs"

I smiled a little. I knew that I could be really hard on the male species, but I think I was a victim of seeing too much before I had experienced it. And from what I had seen, I definitely could do with out actually going through such things myself. I said I smiled a little. I lied, I smiled, a lot. This had, kind of in a sick and debilitating way, warmed my heart and made me smile and made me actually believe that in that one instant that he was right, all men aren't dogs.

That was a valentine's day that I would never forget, other things happened that day but I'd rather focus on the good that come of that. There are a few things in my lifetime that I regret, but being a person that loves too hard at times is not one of those things. I can't help that I fall emotionally sometimes, but I know that, the emotion that I share with a few is genuine its real and should not be taken for granted. Valentines day is a day of love, respect and adoration, its a day were you realize that even with the bad that comes in relationships and friendships that just in that instant to feel the emotion of love is a blessing. I've loved (at least I think) and I have hurt (this I know for a fact), but I won't regret.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Dinner with my LS - The Prayer Formula-Food For the Soul

So my 5 and I (thats my line sister who's number is 5 for those that aren't following) met up at the Kona Grill just because, which is always nice considering that life has a funny way of commandeering as my mother would put it, ever moment and breath of our existence. At times we don't get the opportunity to breathe, not that we can't but we forget too. But this was my waiting to exhale moment minus a man to complicate things and the worries of the the world. So my LS, as well as one of my very best friends took the time to meet up for a momentary escape from reality. Many things were discussed, the state of the school system, the frightening state of the black youth, and how were going to get out and meet new people (primarily of the opposite sex). We ate some, some drank and then we continued to discuss life.

The Lord really works in some SUPER mysterious ways, he opens your eyes to things that are at times inconceivable leaving you to revel in the altruistic power of his love.

Anyhow my 5 and I were talking and was telling me about a sermon given by the pastor of her church discussing how to pray. As kids many of us are taught to pray, but few of really know how to pray, me included so what my LS was telling me made a lot of sense.

She said that her pastor told them that there was a prayer formula that hit 6 points:

1. Praise & Worship - Acknowledgment
2. Pray IN God's Will
3. Pray for Need
4. Pray for Forgiveness
5. Pray for Protection
6. Praise & Worship - Acknowledgment


She said that the Lord's Prayer was a perfect example or if you will prayer template.

Our Father, who art in heaven,

Hallowed be thy Name.

These first two lines are an example of acknowledging the most high

Thy kingdom come.

Thy will be done,

On earth as it is in heaven.

Here we have an example of praying in the will of God. It is the will of God that adequately and effectively drives the purpose in our lives.

Give us this day our daily bread.

Here we ask for the needs of the body soul and the spirit. Just like with anything you need nourishment (in whatever form it maybe) in order to function.

And forgive us our debts

As we forgive our debtors

Man I have such a HUGE problem with this. It is always so much easier to hold a grudge and harness dislike for an individual, but how can we truly be forgiven if we can't ourselves forgive? Forgiveness Forgiveness Forgiveness. Often times we don't afford people the right to such but we ask for it on a daily basis. We have to learn to forgive in order to be forgiven. Forgiveness is not our own to harbor selfishly.

And lead us not into temptation,

But deliver us from evil.

With all of the things that are happening in the world today, we cannot go into "battle" with out the proper protection. Asking the Lord for protection helps us in such a way that those things that seek to attack the mind, body, and spirit are held at bay because of the God that we serve. We even have to often times ask for protection from ourselves, because we can at times be our own worst enemy.

For thine is the kingdom,

and the power, and the glory,

for ever and ever.

And after all is said and done we take the time to re-acknowledge the Lord, affirming that we appreciate and love him knowing that all the things that we have prayed for will come to pass as he sees fit.

Sometimes we pray and we pray and we feel as though the things that we have have prayed for have not been fulfilled and have not been fulfilled in OUR time. I think it is important to remember that immediate gratification of anything is never lasts. It comes and it goes and we are still left were we began empty. So pray faithfully, diligently, and gracefully. Pray for yourself, your family, your friends and your enemies. Pray for patience, understanding, and fulfillment. For what God has for you is for you and you alone, no one can steal that blessing.

Prayerfully yours.....
AMEN!

Drop the ZERO and Throw up the DEUCE

Every morning I get my horoscope via text. Now I don't believe in them but I do find it interesting to read what it is that someone has predicted for my life. So today my horoscope text read as such:

"What do they see in you? Isn't it obvious? You're not a zero. Remember what you like about yourself. Find someone to worship at your feet."

I'll have to admit it made me feel good and made me feel like yelling "You're d**n right I'm not a ZERO!!!"

For one reason or another I am having the best day and I thank God for that. Nothing in particular happened that made today just extra special, but I am at peace and that has to be the best feeling in the world.

Yup Step your PEACE game up.

Isaiah 55:12

You will go out in joy and be led forth in peace; the mountains and hills will burst into song before you, and all the trees of the field will clap their hands.

I think that I just got my standing ovation
and I just took my bow
I threw up my deuce and then
Raised my fist and played to the crowd
No man will steal the joy I now feel
and that is more than a vow
its a promise, one from the most high
my soul is on fire
And Jesus is my flame
lighting my Lord's torch
I set evil to flames
as the ashes settle
and the dust falls
I'm still standing
and the Lord my God
still sits on the thrown
its not a throne of brick or wood, or metal not even stone
its a throne thriving in the Holy Spirit and on a Holy Spirit level
Lift me up
and I praise your name
Earth is my playground
but Heaven is my aim
I'm in love, I'm in love
and it feels so good
better than anything in the physical ever would
So I have officially dropped the zero
and gone with a hero
And I am free indeed
free in him
bestowing upon me a peace that knows no bounds
Inner peace, with an outward joy
a constant edification of all that is right in the world
my soul is on fire
my spirit is at rest
and its all because of and undying, unwavering and unfaltering love
Peace that surpasses all understanding

A GIANT Upset of Epic Proportions

Ok so football is something that is definitely new in my world. But I must admit I love sports and Football is winning its way into my heart. So watching Super Bowl XLII ( for those not familiar with roman numerals- Super Bowl 42) I had so many EUREKA moments that I was starting to get dizzy. Coming into the game the favored 18-0 New England Patriots were the talk of the town, the New York Giants, who had survived the regular season and playoffs, were not overly discussed, gave us a modern day battle of David and Goliath.

To me the game was dominated by tenacious defense. And the end score of 14-17 told that story all to well. I remember during the game wondering what was going on with the Patriots offensive line. The Giants continued to blind them with blitz after blitz, hungry to bring down the Patriots offensive golden child. Mission Accomplished. Right when it seems like the Patriots were getting closer the New York Giants, who had nothing to lose became that much more determined to draw blood.

It was the perfect example of the underdog, refusing to let the past be the predictor of the future. They wrote their own ending to what would seem to be an almost impossibly ridiculous story. But the Giants did it, and did it well.

For the Patriots its just seemed like a game of missed opportunity. It just seemed like someone wanted it more. Talk about a GIANT upset of epic proportions...lol

So here is how this is applicable to everyday life: In some way, at one point or another we are the underdog, but is what has happened before going to continue to be the predictor of what is to come? Or will we be the one to determine how our story ends or if you will begins? The Giants wrote and ending that focused on a new beginning and I am taking this lesson with me. No matter how much the other team has on you, whether if be an impressive record, more money, a better job, there is always room for the underdog to seize their moment and seize victory for the future.

Who's says you can't learn anything from football?..

The Power of Blind Faith

At work and clearly I am suppose to be working, but I had to write this. A friend of mine sent me an e-mail with a message that I often times forget. I was thankful for the reminder...

So the email read as follows:

Do you know the legend of the Cherokee Indian youth's rite of Passage? His father takes him into the forest, blindfolds him and leaves him alone. He is
required to sit on a stump the whole night and not remove the blindfold until the rays of the morning sun shine through it. He cannot cry out for help to
anyone. Once he survives the night, he is a MAN.
He cannot tell the other boys of this experience, because each lad must come into manhood on his own. The boy is naturally terrified. He can hear all kinds of noises. Wild beasts must surely be all around him. Maybe even some human might do him harm. The wind blew the grass and earth, and shook his stump, but he sat stoically, never removing the blindfold. It would be the only way he could become a man!
Finally, after a horrific night the sun appeared and he removed his blindfold. It was then that he discovered his father sitting on the stump next to him. He had been at watch the entire night, protecting his son from harm. We, too, are never alone. Even when we don't know it, God is watching over us, sitting on the stump beside us. When trouble comes, all we have to do is reach out to Him. If you liked this story, pass it on. If not, you took off your blindfold before dawn.

Moral of the story: Just because you can't see God, doesn't mean He is not there. "For we walk by faith, not by sight."

Its like a child. A child doesn't know any better so they are forced to rely on their parent to guide them.

Its like air, we can't see it and at times we can't touch it but we know its there.

You know sight is deceptive. You can't see beyond the surface and as people always say things that look good aren't alway good for you. (kind of like that piece of cake I had for lunch...lol). We live in a world of cynics, and its hard to have faith in things that we can't see, touch or feel.

Do you think that if we had more faith in not only ourselves but others that the world would be a better place? Maybe this is wishful thinking on my part. I know you are going to tell me that all people have a hidden agenda, so its virtually impossible.

Man this faith thing is a trip. All I know is that when times get hard its all I have to rely on. Its a scary thing, relying on something that you might not be sure of. But when the one thing that you have been hoping and praying for comes to pass you cannot deny the power of such blind faith. God is a good God. He knows the desired of my heart and he know the needs of my soul, and I know that what he has in store for me is for me.

God, I can't see you, I can't touch you, but I know you are always there. And I have to apologize because sometimes I forget. Why? Because I get so caught up in what I am doing, and in what I want that I push you to the side, when you make me your constant priority. But this time you're my priority and relying and trusting in you is my goal, its a tug of war at times because I don't want to let go. But I am loosing my grasp, and this is my trust fall trusting that I will fall in the arm of the one who cares for me most....

-Signed
Walking by faith and not by sight...

It's Official I have gone soft..

Mood: Wanting....


Believe it or not I have a soft side. Yea I know....Go Figure!!!

A friend of mine is getting married. I can honestly say that I was worried for him for a bit, but God's Favor is AMAZING, he found someone that not only complimented him, but made him into a man. He has grown so much since he has met her and she has the most amazing spirit. I am really REALLY genuinely happy for them.

While looking at their wedding website, I have to admit I got a little misty eyed. Ok really misty eyed. I know I always act like I am disgusted by love, but man....when you see TRUE love, you can't help but want that same feeling for yourself. Its such an amazing emotion, it makes even the darkest of hearts see light.

India said she was ready for Love
and so am I
I have refused the idea of love for so long
now my wall is being chipped away
brick by brick
stone by stone
But I am scared
scare of what that emotion holds
if I let go
let go of the grasp that I have on my own heart
opening my hands to expose the softest part of me
bearing my soul
will it weather the storms that come
when my hands are full
will there be someone there to hold my umbrella
shielding me from harm
fearing the one emotion that might liberate me
i now know why MY caged bird sings
locked away from the emotion of love
it wants to be free to feel
to be to him
what he might be to me
and together
we
walk hand in hand
I am his support and he is mine
Love
Love is a beautiful thing...

I think that I might actually be ready....

Please Ask Me Why I Decided to Coach yet AGAIN?

So tomorrow is our first official CLUB tournament. Pray on that. I am nervous, for myself as well as the girls I just want them to do well. All I need is for them to be receptive to what it is that I am trying to teach them, more importantly my coaching style...I am a little more militant than people think...lol