?? My QUESTION MARKed Existence ??

It’s a curved line that ends at a secluded island

It emphatically represents what I now feel

The unknown splashed with a dose of reality

It's Like I am alone

And I have said it before

Its my question mark

The path is followed

And met with a dead end

I reach out to hold my prize on my secluded island

But alas I fail

And I fall

Into the land of the in between

And the not quite

Always reaching

Reaching with all my might

But never getting what I think I deserve

I am left question filled

And slightly perturbed

Was life meant to be this hard

I look up and get angry

“What more do you have for me today” I ask

I rant I rave I slash and burn

The destructive nature of what I feel materialized in the physical

And I am left with disillusion and disarray

Hoping to put back together the pieces

Cause humpty fell off the wall that day

And like him my spirit is in pieces

My glues not strong enough

And when I think it is

Is washable, dilute in strength and perseverance

I don’t know if I can go through something, anything again

I’m tired

I’m worn

Feeling pressure to the point that my vision blurs

Nothing is as it seems

And my present state of being concurs

I run to relieve the stress

But I run on a treadmill and my progress is still

Cause I am running in place

I want to get away

And I want to be free

But something or someone refuses to let me be

What is holding me back

And knocking me down

What is covering me in ashes

As my storm surrounds

Me

I can’t see

I can’t feel

The only thing I feel is disappointment

The only thing I see is dark

My heart is heavy

And my spirit sparse.